The fact that a woman is married doesn’t prevent you from falling in love with her even considering the dangers of dating a married woman. It may happen. But is it worth the risk? A relationship with a married woman presents distinctive disadvantages and complications.
A research conducted by Professor Eric Anderson of Winchester University, Uk, had the following revelations. The one hundred women, who took the survey, were not ready to leave their husbands though they had extra-marital affairs.
According to the women, though they strayed, they still felt affection for their husbands. Besides, they had extra-marital experiences because some things were missing in their marriages. These things were emotional intimacy and sexual satisfaction. To take a decisive stand, you’ll need to learn what it takes to wade in these murky waters.
Reasons Why Men Find Themselves in a Relationship With Married Women
Most men don’t plan to date a married woman. However, circumstances may sometimes allow you to connect with such a woman. These are:
- You are attracted and begin to date a woman you don’t know is married.
- You intentionally pursue a woman you know is married.
- You don’t have an intention to romantically get connected with her but fall in love with her anyway.
What are the Disadvantages of Falling in Love with a Married Woman?
Loving a married woman can sometimes be emotionally draining and depressing. Here are some dangers of dating a married woman that you need to consider if you are in such a relationship, or considering getting into one.
1. You Are a Second Option
Married women get into illicit affairs either because they are unhappy with their marriage or fall into temptation. While she may be your great sexual partner and happy with you, she won’t abandon her husband for you. Unfortunately, if your relationship loses momentum and sex gets boring, she may move to somebody else, or consider being faithful to her husband.
Moreover, she may put her family, kids, and social commitments before you. In social gatherings, she may prefer to be by her husband’s side and attend to her kids, leaving you in a lurch. Also, she may cancel a date at the last minute because she has to be with her family. For her, you are a second option.
2. Her Husband May Find Out the Affair
If you are unfortunate and you get caught in this illegitimate affair, her husband’s wrath may fall on you. If he discovers that his wife is sleeping with another man, his ego will be hurt. And since you are the other man, you will be his target. He may react in several ways, including resorting to violence against you and his wife.
Also, you may find yourself contending with what the husband is offering. These are things like satisfying his wife’s emotional needs and being better in bed.
As a result, you may become stressed when you think about the need to be better than the husband in these aspects of marriage. Besides, even if she was to divorce her husband because of your relationship, the comparison will not stop. She may continue comparing your relationship with her previous marriage.
3. You May be Heartbroken
Heartbreaks are part of relationships. However, in a relationship with a married woman, it’s easier. Getting involved with a married woman may not end up in a long-term relationship. She may not be looking forward to ending her marriage. Meaning investing your time and emotions in this relationship may lead to a dead end.
Secondly, women who cheat on their husbands are likely to cheat again. Thus, you can’t trust them even if they leave their husbands to be with you. Additionally, such relationships are not dependent on mutual oaths and promises. You, therefore, just need one conversation to break up forever.
4. Problems Starting a New Family
Loving a married woman can make her lose her family. Your relationship may sever her from her home, kids, husband, and lifestyle. As a result, she may decide to divorce her husband and live with you. The situation becomes complicated if you have to deal with angry kids, family, and friends.
She may also move in with her kids, therefore, adding her responsibilities to you. That means you may not give birth to your desired number of children. On the other hand, if she has kids with her husband, she may refuse to end her marriage.
Advantages of Having an Affair with a Married Woman
Though loving a married woman is deemed wrong, some people still go for it. According to such people, married women are mature. Therefore, they tackle problems better. And though there are serious consequences related to such a relationship, there may be some bright sides too. After all, even the darkest clouds have a silver lining. Here are some upsides of having an affair with a married woman;
1. It Can be Cheap
A married woman deals with daily expenses in her marriage. That means, from her marriage experience, she may be a spendthrift. Therefore, she may be knowledgeable about how to use money economically. And since she’s hiding from the public eye, your outing options may be limited.
Additionally, she may understand that frequenting expensive restaurants may not be a good idea if she wants to keep you. She may also ensure to keep off places where people traffic is high such as malls and movies. It may not matter to her whether you give her flowers or buy her birthday gifts because she doesn’t want her husband to be suspicious. The overall effect – you get to manage your finances well.
2. Little Dedication
Some men prefer dating married women because they don’t want to commit themselves to a relationship. Since she is already married, in love with a married woman may not lead to a marriage commitment. It may be based majorly on lust and infatuation that probably will not end in a marriage union. You don’t also have to call her often as she may not pick your calls all the time.
3. It’s Secretive
If you are in love with a married woman, likely, you may not want to publicize the relationship. It is illicit. Therefore, you are likely to meet secretly and keep things low. You may not even tell your friends that you are in such a relationship for fear your little secret may leak out. It also means you will be meeting less and in private. So if you are a guy who loves privacy, it may suit you.
Should You Continue Loving Her or Terminate the Relationship?
Dating a married woman, as already mentioned, has it’s share of drawbacks and illegalities. However, it also seems to have a bright side. If you still wish to continue with such a relationship despite all challenges involved, you need to consider the following:
Evaluate Your Desires and Needs
You need to evaluate your relationship desires if you still love a married woman. You may want to connect with her in a real way, but because she’s married, it may be impossible. As a result, you may hurt your emotions. Additionally, you may seek love but not find it. So if you are seeking a long-term relationship, this may not be the correct choice.
Pillars of a Good Relationship
The foundation of a loving relationship is intimacy, commitment, and passion. If you are only seeking for one of these, your love may be empty. It’s difficult to experience these three pillars if you are in a relationship with a married woman. Remember, it’s one woman against two men.
She may be intimate to you but committed to her husband. It’s this imbalance that may make your relationship insecure and vulnerable. Moreover, it may be challenging to establish an emotional connection without these pillars.
Search Yourself
For a relationship with a married woman to grow, you need to not only be open to one another but also share your emotions. You, therefore, need to explore where you are in your relationship, emotionally. If you are uncomfortable staying with that person, maybe it’s time to rethink.
Conclusion
Loving a married woman is deemed illicit, immoral, and illegal. It also presents you with a set of complications and downsides because she’s married. You may consider getting into such a relationship because you are a lover of shortcuts. That is, you don’t want any commitments and emotional attachments, but an avenue to satisfy your wild sexual fantasies. It may appear the right relationship for you.
However, if you get attached emotionally, things may start crumbling down on you. You may suffer from heartbreaks, loneliness, and guilt. So before you continue with your pursuit, you should keep in mind the dangers of dating a married woman and you need to ask yourself if this is what you want. You can do this by evaluating your desires and needs, searching yourself, and equipping yourself with knowledge on what makes a good relationship. It’s only after doing this that you can know whether you want to continue or quit.
References:
1. https://datingtips.match.com/disadvantages-dating-married-woman-7954627.html
2. https://godatenow.com/blog/relationships/the-pros-and-cons-of-dating-a-married-woman-/