Listening to the word ‘Introvert’, the first thing popping in our mind is of a person sitting alone. Not interacting with anyone and busy in himself/herself. But, you have to know that it is absolutely irrational. Introversion is not always hinged with quietness or un-socialization.
An American psychologist, Jonathan Greek, in his 2011 paper on introversion argued that “There are four main types of introverts; Anxious, Restrained, Thinking and Social- though overlap is normal.” This consigns that introverts are not un-socializing. But yes they are generally unable to express their feelings when it comes to love. They generally tend to be an over-thinker too. But it is not ‘Introvert specific character.’ It becomes a ‘do or die’ like situation for them. Dating an introvert is a tough task but you must also know that they are more romanticized than an extrovert.
It becomes very irksome to always tell someone the same thing without getting any different results. It happens when you are with an introvert. You will also start feeling that they are not as involved as you. You may start having second thoughts about that person and relationship. This mainly happens due to the expectations you have built for your introvert partner. Instead of being judgemental, you need to understand your partner’s personality traits. And if you are in a relationship with an introvert person then you need to learn how they express themselves when they are in love too.
1. When they start sharing
Sharing is something very common in a relationship. It’s also said that “To build a healthy relationship you need to communicate with each other.” I know you must be thinking about the big deal in this. But it is when it comes to an introvert. They are generally inward turning. Merely share anything with others. But if they start doing so, then this shows they believe in you and are comfortable with you. By sharing, they are allowing you to know them rather than letting you drown yourself in the ocean of your own imagination. They are sharing things with you means, you are a close one for them and also important in their life. This is one of the subtle ways they express their love for you.
2. You become their ‘go-to’ person
What do you do when you are excited or disheartened? You usually share things with a person whom you are comfortable with and rely on them for their opinion. Introverts live within the little moments, and let you in them to show you the love they have for you. They generally do not like to consider the other person. For them, you are the only person visible in a group of people or in a crowd. They believe in self-introspection and deduce things according to their notions. But if they are letting you know about the events of their life which are desolating or joyful to them, then they are considering you as their part of life.
3. Often talks to you
It becomes easy to understand people who speak their heart out. But, introverts are very reserved and hard to discern. They are very self-conscious and alert about themselves while indulging in any activity. This is because they have a conception that other person may not value their words or may not comprehend it in the way they do. They keep on fumbling with their thought processes inside and end up thinking “Silence is better than words.” So if your introvert partner is talking to you often then it simply means they are connecting to you. Talking on calls also becomes a challenge for them as they have to speak to continue the conversation. Mostly they prefer texting over calls where they do not have to face real one-to-one conversation. But if they are talking to you via calls then it is clear that they want to come out of their comfort zone to be with you.
4. Wanting to spend time with you
Isn’t it easy to give excuses to avoid someone? Just throw a convincing statement and here you are with your own time. It takes a lot to invest on someone other than yourself. And introverts hesitate to invest on someone whom they don’t trust blindly. We think that introverts like being lonely, staying at home, reading books rather than enjoying parties etcetera. But they do not want to be aloof, instead, they enjoy solitude. They seclude themselves from others to analyze the hustle of thought processes occurring in their mind. They don’t like interruptions in their private space. And if they are spending time with you, then they want you to break the walls and share the space with them too.
5. Breaking their shells with you
“I can bring stars and moons from the sky”, sounds surreal right? Likewise, it is for the introverts when it comes to breaking their shell for someone special. But it is true that boundaries stand nowhere when love unfolds itself. If they start stepping out of their comfort zone and do ‘extroverted’ things for you like walking hand in hand in public places, enjoying even crowded places with you. Then you are not just any person for him/her. It is a way they unravel themselves in front of you. They would do things with you which makes you feel comfortable. They start putting you first. It is their way of showing love and affection towards you. This depicts how important you are to them.
6. Doing unexpected things
Introverts are very sensitive and it becomes narrower when it comes to feelings. When they start feeling for someone they would do anything to keep that person happy and connected to them. They keep doing things that you would have never even imagined from them. It may be surprising you on your birthday to make it more special for you, giving you gifts, taking you to unexpected rides, organizing special dates, and many more. They find happiness in doing little things for you. They may have difficulty with words. But prove themselves worthy by their actions. And this is what they firmly believe on.
7. Showing you their vulnerable side.
Introverts keep on examining themselves internally. They never want to show their weaknesses to others as they face a lot of trust issues with people. They also keep on scrutinizing the situations on the basis of their past experiences which makes them more specific towards their approach. Showing your vulnerable side to someone means you want that person to accept you as they are without judging you. Similarly, they also want you to accept them with their ‘introversion’ personality. They do not want to lose you at any cost and want to be their true self with you.
8. May sound insolent.
Introverts are quite straight forward. They do not go for buttering things up to make it sound well for the other person. In other words, they are mostly honest in their opinions. If they don’t find their partner looking good in a dress, they would simply confess that to them. There is no ‘slightly bad’ or ‘not that good’ for them. Sometimes, it may also sound rude but it’s just that they don’t want you to go with false opinions to make yourself feel good. And of course, it is also a way they convey their love for you.
9. They are intimate with you
When it comes to romance, introverts are more romantic than extroverts. They are very much intensive about their feelings and actions. Intimacy does not only mean in a sexual way. They can make you feel intimated by their words and gestures too. When they start feeling deeply for you then they are unable to resist their feelings for you. They are very passionate about their special one. Being with an introvert brings you beautiful rides of romanticism.
Introversion is generally misunderstood in society just like ‘loneliness’ and ‘solitude’, ‘ quietness’, and ‘shyness’. Unlike an extrovert, introvert gets recharged in their own company. They prefer to be quiet because they do not want to waste their energy on unnecessary talks. They retain their energy for the right time and the right person. They are engaged with small groups of close friends. They tend to escape from overstimulation. But all these characteristics are not accountable for their ‘un-expressible’ nature. No person is absolute. Being quite sensitive, they just perceive things at a high degree of intensity. They are not ‘social butterflies’, but like to socialize and divide their space with someone whom they believe in. Initially, being in a relationship with an introvert may make you feel pessimistic about the bond. But, gradually when you start to apprehend them, you will recognize the intensity of love you both are sharing with each other. If you are dating an introvert you will automatically get the vibes of love in spite of them being a bit un-expressive. They may be hard to decipher initially but are easy to understand and love afterward.